1. Are you forever alone?
2. Do guys stare at you with weird looks on their faces?
3. Do other chicks always stand close to you when guys are around?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, and your goal is to attract males then you might want to read these fashion don'ts. If you're not sure why other chicks standing close to you when guys are around would matter - it's because your awful style makes them look more attractive.
Besides the wedgie and camel toe you'll be sporting, your chaffed V-gina and thighs should be enough to stop you from doing this.
What guys think when they see this: "She's hiding a flabby gut."
No muffin tops allowed. I know you heard that curves are sexy, but what they meant was the hour glass figure of a fit woman. Not fat. No one wants to see your fat rolls hanging over your pants. You look like you're melting.
What guys think when they see this: "Someone call Jenny Craig quick" and "Fat chicks are easy...now's my chance! muahahahaha."
If you're a size 9 wear a size 9. Guys actually don't really care about how big your feet are, as long as you take care of them. Wearing shoes that are too small for you only makes your feet look fatter.
What guys think when they see this: "Oh gross."
Guys understand that girls like makeup, but if you're wearing makeup to attract guys then you're barking up the wrong tree. The only guys your makeup will attract are the kind that love to watch One Tree Hill and can recite the words to every Beyonce song. Fabulous! Men prefer a more natural look.
What guys think when they see this: "Oh damn! The circus is in town. I better see if my friends want to go."
There are very few women who can pull off red lipstick. Odds are that you are not one of them. Go with a lighter more neutral color. Bright red lipstick screams I'm desperate for attention from anyone....anyone at all....any takers?
What guys think when they see this: "That poor girl must be hooking her way through college."
We know. Trust me we know. Trimming your eyebrows all the time is time consuming and a pain. But beauty takes effort. Try being a guy with a beard. Could you imagine if we shaved off our beards, and then painted them back on. Yeah. That's how you look. Ridiculous.
What guys think when they see this: "Should have drawn on an evil arch. Then I might have considered taking you to a cosplay convention at least."
Guys like cleavage. Yes, this is true. But they also like a little mystery. When you're making a desperate attempt to show your goods off then it becomes very un-sexy. And don't tell me you aren't trying to show off your rack....why did you buy the shirt with the extra long v-neck that goes all the way down to your belly just to catch that bit of your droopy boob cleavage?
What guys think when they see this: "Herpes, gonorrhea, syphilis.....I wonder why this chick is so desperate."
8. Go Easy On the Powder
Foundation powder should be used to cover up blemishes. Not your face. If Your face reminds people of Winter in the Hamptons then you're wearing way too much.
What guys think when they see this: "It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas."
Jersey Shore wasn't a popular tv show because people thought they had great style and were really cool. It was popular because people like to laugh at weird people. Afraid of getting sun cancer? What do you think all those tanning chemicals are going to do to you genius?
What guys think when they see this: "Oompa loompa doopity doo."
10. Stop Dressing Like a Hippy
One thing to remember about this 40 year old style is that it was popular at a time when just about everyone was on drugs. This is not a good look for anyone. You look dirty, sloppy, and like a Betty Ford Clinic patient waiting to happen.
What guys think when they see this: "Feminist man hater" or "Druggie"
